It’s well known that children who misbehave don’t get any presents on Christmas Day and must spend the following 12 months being extra good.
But here is a fate worse than that. Mischievous scamps on the naughty list will be punished by spending 110 minutes in the company of Nativity 3: Dude, Where’s My Donkey?!.
There are elements of this shambolic third instalment of festive fables that little ones might enjoy: flatulence, dollops of donkey dung and a gurning man-child dressed in an oversized animal costume.
However, no amount of wrapping can disguise an early Christmas turkey, overstuffed with sickly sentiment, mawkish musical sequences and gargantuan leaps of logic.
It’s a crying, snivelling shame.