So here is a brief introduction to the men behind the party labels.

The youngest of the three is Tomas Thurogood-Hyde, who is standing in the Labour interest. He is only a year or so out of the grammar school, but can write a very erudite leaflet.

If he did not get a starred A in English, he certainly deserved one and can always find an elegant argument to prove beyond doubt that Gordon Brown's latest position is wise and wonderful. These days, that takes exceptional skill. He is a veritable mental gymnast.

Allan Knox is standing for the Liberals and is in his 30s. Oddly, he does not seem to have a job, but keeps himself busy sitting as a Clitheroe town councillor and Ribble Valley borough councillor as well as playing golf at Mytton Fold.

If he could add a seat on the county council to his collection, that should keep him going nicely until the General Election, when he intends to get elected to Parliament and give up all three councillorships.

The oldest of the three is John Hill, a wily local government lawyer in his 50s. I call him wily as I cannot imagine any other quality he has that could have attracted his delectable wife, Phillipa.

Having been Conservative leader of Ribble Valley Borough Council for years, he has just done a stint as Mayor and now has his eye on the £700m. a year the county spends. He has the idea that, if county goes Conservative, it will, at last, start spending the money in Conservative boroughs like Ribble Valley, rather than keeping it for Labour ones. Apparently, a 4% swing is all that is needed to bring the money home.

Those are the three candidates and I hope I will not be accused of favouritism if I mention another Liberal, Stephen Sutcliffe. Stephen now sports a grey beard and has retired after serving as Clitheroe's county councillor since 1997.

In the Liberals' latest leaflet, he complains that, although he has worked very hard on our behalf for the past 12 years, county has a "cabinet" system of government and individual councillors cannot make any real difference.

I really do feel for him after 12 years of unremitting and fruitless slog.

The Liberals only have four seats on the county council – out of 84 – so they can never get into the cabinet and actually do anything at all, except draw their expenses and allowances.

It is odd that Stephen should mention it in a Liberal election leaflet, but it is the truth. If you want Clitheroe's councillor to achieve anything on the county council, he has to be Labour or Conservative.

thecontrarian@hotmail.co.uk